Finally Able to Talk a Little About Details

Still not willing to go into really private stuff as for all I want to be open here there are also some things I feel really need to be kept within a relationship’s privacy boundaries.  So no lurid details.


However, I’m where I can speak on it a bit.


As I said in previous posts about this, it’s not that Chael and I don’t love each other very much or that either of us are evil to each other.  I’ve spoken all over in real-life and the net how happy and in love we tend to be.  That’s very true.

But he has some habits that on their own or once in a while aren’t a big deal… but after 15 years of it, I finally reached a point of “fuck this”.

And so this week we’ve been addressing that… and the details on his lying have come out.  He lies.  He lies a LOT.

And I don’t mean just over something big or such, I mean he lies constantly about all kinds of things… I knew he had a bit of a problem with this, but this past week of talking has shown me how much of a problem it is.  It’s NEEDS THERAPY level.

Then, last night I caught him out in a mega-lie.  Mega.

Rumpus has not been that pissed before in her entire life.  It was UGLY.  As I just joked with my leather family:  my wrath rivaled fire and brimstone.

I’m still a level of angry that is dangerous from moment to moment.

So Chael got a deal.  I’m not divorcing him right away.  I’m giving him another chance.  The deal:  he goes to therapy and works really and truly hard on his problem…and in the meantime any time I catch him in a lie I’m going to beat the living shit out of him.

And if this goes on too long without progress, I’m leaving his ass.

I know this sounds really aggressive and rough, but it’s come to that point after the general accumulation I’ve learned this week and then the thing last night.  I’m at the end of my patience, sweetness, and light.


We love each other.  We’re not either of us evil.  He’s not actively trying to hurt me.  We want to stay together and grow old and travel and do all the things we’d intended to do all these years.

But there are some things I won’t put up with.

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